For the Dialog
LEWES – It’s easy to become anonymous in a large parish, according to Father Tom
Flowers.
Too often the parish’s focus when most people come to the church complex is on logistics: getting people in and out of Sunday Mass, and then out of the parking lot before another wave of parishioners arrives. While such logistics are necessary, the pastoral leadership at St. Jude the Apostle Church wants its approximately 2,000 registered households to feel at home at St. Jude’s, said Father Flowers, pastor.
Last month, the parish’s two priests, four deacons, and pastoral associate Kathy Ebner began a series of home visitations. Their goal is to visit every registered household over the next three years.
“We’re there almost exclusively for listening,” Father Flowers said.
Won‘t ask for money
Despite Father Flowers’ assurance that the visitors will not ask for money or try to sign people up for anything, parishioners are somewhat skeptical.
“The most common thing I’ve found is, ‘What do you want?’” Ebner said. “They’re not sure why we’re coming. When they hear we just want to listen, they say, ‘Wow, I didn’t think Catholics did that.’”
Deacon Scott Landis said the goal is to fill a gap between the parish and its members. “We have a lot of folks out there that need to get a one-on-one connection they don’t now get.”
As that happens, the leadership team hopes to learn more about parishioners and the parish’s demographics. Retirees still make up a sizeable portion of the parish, but more and more young people are moving in. Father Flowers said that is seen in plans for five new schools in the area.
He also cited the growth of the religious education program that Landis directs. When St. Jude became an independent parish 14 years ago, 40 children were in religious education; today there are about 200. Enrollment is expected to grow to about 400 in a few years, Father Flowers said.
The parish currently has an ad hoc committee on how to make St. Jude more child-friendly, he said, and has hired a youth and young adult minister.
He plans to talk to young people in households he visits, seeking ideas for the youth ministry. He explains that while he has some ideas, he realizes he is 65 and young Catholics may have other ideas.
Explaining traditions
Ebner’s very first visitation showed the program’s value for the pastoral staff as well as parishioners. “The very first family I went to, I didn’t know them from Adam,” she said. As they talked, “it seemed everyone in the world knew her except for me.
“It’s been a blessing for us, too.”
The visits can also be vehicles for explaining Catholic traditions. Ebner said she took a bottle of holy water, used to bless oneself with the Sign of the Cross, to give a woman she visited. The woman said, “Well, what do I do with it?”
“When I told her, she said, ‘OK, I’ll take it.’”
The visitations, which began last month, have already made an impact: The parish is considering a traveling statue of Mary, which would rotate weekly among households in the manner of a vocation chalice that currently rotates among families. The families use the chalice to focus on prayers for clergy and religious vocations.
A woman that Father Flowers visited mentioned the vocation chalice and fondly recalled how her previous parish had a traveling statue of Mary. Though she did not suggest that St. Jude organize such a program, Father Flowers thought it might help younger parishioners, in particular, better understand Mary’s role in the church.
The visitation program began along a similar track. During a staff meeting earlier this year Father Jones Kukatla, associate pastor, recalled that in a parish in his native India, he and other priests made home visitations which he found beneficial, Father Flowers said. By the end of May, the parish officially commissioned the priests, deacons and Ebner to make the visitations, which along with bulletin announcements made parishioners aware of the program.
Registered households were divided evenly among the seven visitors, generally by geographic areas; each visitor has about 280 households. “We figure that in three years, we will have visited all that want to be visited,” Father Flowers said.
Knowing their stories
The program continues what Father Flowers considers one of St. Jude’s strengths. “Our greeters do a great job making people feel welcome” at Mass, he said. “Now we want to develop that more.”
As the priests and deacons, who give the homilies at Mass, learn more about parishioners, the familiarity will help them all at Mass by allowing the clergy to link the readings to the people they serve.
“When I get up to preach, when you see people and know their stories, you can do a better job,” Father Flowers said.
